Wednesday, September 18, 2019

Generational Shift; Moving The Bar To My Level

A death of someone close or closer in age reminds us of our own mortality. 

We listen, watch and learn as we see others move along the path of life, dying and death.

A funeral. Same Church Mom was taken to; her choice; our love of her to fulfill, to participate, to ackowledge her departure.

A cousin by marriage. Close in age but not really close as we lived "in the city" and she and her husband lived "in the country" far enough in time and distance and leading their lives having and raising a family as we were.

My time. But it really wasn't. Thinking back. Yes, there were occasions, events, special times. 

The direction was always "moving ahead" against odds and challenges purposely moved aside in order to move ahead -- education, activities, family times -- prioritizing the positive while dealing with the negatives life hands out without any respect for to whom, when, where, how many times and how much disturbance is given.

Now I supposedly have "my time". 

Desires to continue to become -- before my time not to have choices, preferences, capability and capacity enter my life's door and that final curtain is drawn.

Life isn't selective although it often feels like it is; we are born, we live and we pass through this life.

No matter what you believe about here, now, there, whenever, as we walk, run, stand and wait watching others and ourselves move through life challenges, it's always a learning experience.

My cousin is now faced with "the process" of the absence and change that accompanies losing a spouse of many years.

Remembering the "period of adjustment" most in our age group went through as we married and started "cohabitating" -- so different from many today who chose to live together.

I wonder....if/when they marry and one or the other departs this life...will it be the same....I think the loss will be but the memories will be slightly changed.

How do we react to the loss? Each of us has our own tape measure; each of us has a life affected in different ways and so reacts at the moment and each step along life's continuing road very differently.

Some judge. Some evaluate. Some decide. The "some" being family, friends, acquaintances even. 

Sad but true; others are really thinking either been there, done that or glad it's not me or what now for her/him.

We are residents of the here and now asked to consider, evaluate and conclude about today, the future and the hereafter -- meaning our leaving this life.

Best we can do, in my opinion, is stop judging, start talking and above all live today as it will soon be tomorrow built on yesterdays.

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