Writings of An Accused Elder Abuser and An Enabler

You're reading the writings of a person who was reported to the State Elder Abuse Hotline for financial and emotional abuse of her mother in the home they shared for almost forty years, where her daughter and chronically, critically ill husband (who would pass from this world just a few months later) also lived.

My adult daughter states she has to have been an "enabler" because she lived in the house and if Grandma was "abused" and she didn't report it, she was an enabler. Then, too, so was my dying husband as there were times when he was able to be up and about and had a phone he could have used to make the call to the Hotline. Three people. One family. Almost forty years of multigenerational living with extended family and friends and no "elder abuse" problems until one woman entered our lives.

Innocent until proven guilty is what we believe our United States and State Laws promise.  Due process, we’re told, we all receive.  From early education onward we’re taught we’ll have the ability to face our accuser and provided specific rights before authorities make decisions.

Qualified people who understand Elder Abuse and the challenges of the elderly including all forms of Dementia including the Lewy Body Dementia then undiagnosed in my Mom are who we expect to be responding to and ensuring a complete and thorough investigation is made of not only the person accused but the person making the accusation.

Sadly, our State hires people to work for the DHSS doing general work with Seniors who only need to have a GED and a year or two of working in a "service related" job. Ringing up sales one day at Walmart and tomorrow determining the lives of our elder citizens and their families.

Even more concerning is the Adult Protective Worker appointments which simply require a year's work at entry level and "good reports" plus a little extra training.

NO SOCIAL WORK DEGREE. NO LICENSED CLINICAL SOCIAL WORKER DEGREE OR EXPERIENCE.  NO MASTERS IN SOCIAL WORK.  These people make life affecting decisions and grave health errors as they did in our situation. More on the DHSS APW visiting my husband in the hospital and her possible "deathly" mistake in another entry.

Apparently our State and others choose to write Statues setting aside indivdiual rights believing anyone accused of the crime of Elder Abuse has to be guilty and therefore does not deserve rights. To access my report, I'd have to hire an attorney or try to convince the State Attorney General's office to investigate one of the their own State Departments.

Highly recommend you do a Google search for Elder Abuse Statues/Laws and fill in your State's name. Be informed. Read carefully. Assume you're accused and not guilty as you read. Could you lose what we have? Should you have to?

I’ll write another time about what we’ve endured as a family for three years because of the false, misleading and deceptive report filed by a woman who has continued to insert herself in the life of my Mom with diagnosed Lewy Body Dementia not as the friend she proports to be but as a manipulator and controller trying to continue to hide the real emotional and financial abuse she causes.

I'll continue to provide guidance on the journey with Dementia, especially Lewy Body Dementia which we are getting to know so well and the world of living with an aging loved one through providing Home Care and continued care after entry into Skilled Nursing.

Each day by our actions and whether we choose to speak up or remain silent, we each create the world we live in.

We are responsible for the present and the future using the past as our guideline.

My daughter and I continue to raise our voices to bring about change.

We travel the path our elders walk on, we’re just a few steps behind.