Thursday, May 1, 2014

Lessons Learned from Living With LBD & Being the Survivors

Daughter and I have one another. For this, I give thanks every day.

We've kept our home, a constant struggle economically in these most difficult times. Not working for as long as I did caring for Mom and my husband took tremendous tolls on what we'd saved and what we had.

Learning that choices made along the way of life may seem for the best at the time, may remain positive as the years pass while still causing great upset and difficulties.

Understanding some may never understand the value of what we chose to do as having the significant value we see.

The work I've found and daughter's found, often just in the last moments when we were "going down" for what we thought was the last time.

Struggling isn't always a positive action. It's never "fun" to wonder where and when the basics of life will be there or how you can make it to and through the next challenge waiting around the corner or behind the next turn.

Been there. Done that. Didn't want to again. Not my choice. Realizing I was too long away to truly understand. Down, but not for the count. A hand always reaching out from unexpected places and people, holding onto ours sometimes for a long time and sometimes for short periods but always there when we need it even if not the way we felt we needed.

Knowing I would do it again. All of it. For each of them.

Learning about people and especially family members and some friends. In the beginning they're there but then they go away. It's all right; it's difficult for them. They don't know how to act, what to say and certainly not who we really are. Their lives, too, will change in many ways as they travel life's road.

Survival is more than money.  Caring, sharing, discovering inner strengths and outer resources.

Taking even more pleasure in daily life "freebies": beautiful sunrises and sunsets; amazing weather; food, of any kind; finding extra change and knowing you can get gas to go to visit Mom yet another time before she leaves this life.

Anger comes along for the ride, too.  Frustration tags along. Disbelief in systems and people who should and could see, hear and speak up, IF ONLY .....

Realization life is personal and private while being up for grabs in the social media world we live in.

Despite one son's claims, I do have value, I have succeeded and I will continue...

Sadness for those who cannot or will not set their "egos" aside and see others needs and dreams.

Joy despite sorrow. Laughter amid the tears. Faith continuously abiding. Love eternal and beyond life as we know it. Hope for tomorrow here and tomorrow there with both sides giving Life.

These are some of my daily lessons and I know there is more to learn.

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