To have and to hold, til death do us part . . .
Planning and celebration followed by change and fears
I think therefore I am, only as long as I can
My everyday life and living.
The road we walk, from here to there
Winds, climbs, turns and drops
In control, at the helm, able to steer, able to halt.
Decisions I make point to the direction I take.
Would it were so easy as years flying by
So many aims for pie in the sky.
We're told we can make it if we just try.
Decades added swiftly now.
Time stands to fall around One and All.
I stopped expecting he would change
Like my Dad, he focuses on self.
Hurting those who gave and loved so long
Can't change a cat's stripes, the saying goes.
Ah, well, perhaps one of his five
Will someday see what's made them blind.
False, misleading, self centered lives
How sad the parent's focus, how sad their plans.
Can't change what he refuses to see.
The harm they do isn't to "me".
It's self inflicted and self imposed
Some day he will lighten the load.
Until that time I see and I know . . .
What waits ahead is pre-chosen
He can't serve two masters
Freedom did not change or end with me.
Sad he's not able to say:
"Let's stop this unneeded separation . . .
My behavior was wrong, I made many mistakes . . .
I jumped to conclusions and put my "self" above all. . .
That self centered focus is what causes a fall. . .
Someday, my son, we'll meet again
You will be able to speak freely, will see far clearer
It could be sooner, if you so choose
We all have a very large amount to lose
Even farther as the road lengthens
As generations come and go.
It's your choice, as always,
We do not sit and wait
Our lives filled with giving, not hate.
Sad you've not seen the light
The darkness called and you went.
Perhaps you'll wake up someday and see
You left the best behind when you hit the tree.
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